mountain lion tracks

So we have our Specimen A Listofcountrymusicsingersuc Pappu) who was born with a silver spoon in his mouth (which was later surgically removed, I suppose). Hits the gym everyday and builds his boddie to make full use of his blue eyed angrez looks. The man has it all- a fancy schmancy MBA, holidays in France, the fast cars, the expensive watches and designer perfume (the modern metrosexual man, eh?).. No wonder he’s a craze among the lay-deej! Still has his papa’s faith (mine lost faith in me sometime in high school), musically talented.. The man reigns where ever he goes. But poor Specimen A, in spite of all this, the dude is taunted, publicly, in a farewell party with real loud music. Teased by the very people he parties with, his popularity and star quality notwithstanding- simply because he cannot dance!

Now consider Specimen B - yours truly. Pappu probably is already at a dance studio, the finest his money can get! Not only can B not dance (and not afford the class either), B doesn’t have any of the other things Pappu has. If the well endowed and talented Pappu’s fate is this, mera kya hoga, Kaaliya??

Dream sequence: song and dance, with at least a hundred youngsters on the floor, and a DJ wearing psychedelic colors (well, Specimen B can’t have real parties, the lease doesn’t allow that, don’t you know?)

Tirkit daana tirkit daana hee hee haa haa last chance
Tirkit daana tirkit daana hee hee haa haa last chance

Hai globular, hai jocular,
Hai globular, hai jocular, irregular and singular! (she’s singular.. she’s singular)
Iski to life ek daze hai
140 pounds she weighs hai
Her mundane life is rotten through
Milta nahi use praise hai… (use praise hai…)
Ise gaana nahi aata hai, but gaati “la la la”
Iske muh pe lagaao thaala! (hoye hoye hoye hoye)
Iske muh pe lagaao thaala! (hoye hoye hoye hoye)

Wenna may I see you when you prance and you fall
And a wenna may I see you when you prance….hey!

Tirkit daana tirkit daana hee hee haa haa fat chance
Tirkit daana tirkit daana hee hee haa haa fat chance

Paida yeh hui to tab bhi thi yeh chunky
Kisi se na hui dosti, aur nikli ek flunkie
Hey yeah yeah… iske paas na paisaaaaa
Hey yeah yeah… wants a guy Imraan ke jaisaa
Hey yeah yeah… yeh to bahut bekaar hai……
Hey yeah yeah.. paas na car hai, na yaar hai
And she never got romance waala! (hoye hoye hoye hoye)
And she never got romance waala! (hoye hoye hoye hoye)

End dream sequence

Sigh.

P.S. to the non-Hindi-understanding section of the readership: English translation to the dream sequence can be found here
P.P.S: the original score can be found here

“I want you to know there’s no tape recorder here tonight, no backing tracks,” Kid Rock told the crowd of mock-Playboy bunnies, Theweddingsingerg cowboys, and C-list celebrities Thursday night at Los Angeles’ Gibson Amphitheater. “This isn’t American Idol. This is American badass!” Indeed.

Earlier, before Rock entered the amphitheater, some words appeared on the jumbotron screen behind the band: “Where’s Kid?” Thus launching us on a mini-search party. Is Kid in the tour Trackphoneglw with the strippers? Nope! Is Kid outside? Don’t see him. Is Kid in the Waffle House? Certainly not. So where’s Kid? Cue Journey’s “Don’t Stop Believing” on the house speakers — it’s the, “born and raised in South Detroit” line that appeals here — and Rock bounds onstage in a glorious white jumpsuit that would make Madonna jealous.

Opening with country-rap hybrid “Rock N Roll Jesus,” Rock darted down the catwalk, his microphone spending equal time tucked into his pants as in his hands, allowing him to raise his arms and taunt the already enthusiastic crowd with come-hither fingers. On songs like “All Summer Long” and “Cowboy,” little coaxing is necessary — the audience is already squealing and sweating.